Watch Duty Sucks!
by Z.A.G
Summary: Quick fic. A fic about how Yuffie handles having watch duty with Cloud. Energetic vs. calm. Sarcasm meets Mr. Serious. The brat vs. The Leader. Mischief fought by wits. How will these two fair throughout the night? Poor, poor Cloud.I pity him, somewhat.
1. Watch Duty Sucks!

Howdy y'all! Well this here is a rather pointless little fic I typed up out of sheer boredom. It has no significant value whatsoever. It's just used to pass the time by. Well anyways, It's about the first night Yuffie joined AVALANCHE. Unfortunately she's has to keep watch that night with Cloud as the others sleep. Heh heh, who knows maybe if I feel really stupid I'll continue this.

Disclaimer- I don't own Final Fantasy 7.

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Watch Duty Sucks!

The flames dance across the logs in the night, giving the clearing a faint red glow. The only sounds of the night are the night creatures and the crackling of the fire. Two people sit around the fire, watching the mystical dance of the flames. One is the leader of the rebel group AVALANCHE, the other is the groups newest member. A energetic teenage ninja.

"I'm bored." Yuffie whines as she draws figures in the dirt with a stick.

Cloud gives a half smile a bit from his spot on a log, "So am I."

Yuffie let's out a miserable sigh, "Why did I get stuck with watch duty on my first day?"

"So you can prove your worth." Cloud replies.

"I kicked your guys asses didn't I?"

Cloud raises an eyebrow and crosses his arms, "If I recall correctly, I managed to beat you."

"Ah.. I let you win." Yuffie says defensively.

"Sure..."

Yuffie pulls out her pinwheel, "Wanna a rematch?" Yuffie asks with a smirk.

Cloud sits on the ground and leans his back a bit on the log. He closes his eyes, "Not interested." Cloud replies.

"Nyuk! Nyuk! Nyuk! It's because you're afraid of me isn't it?" Yuffie says proudly.

"....Petrified." Cloud mumbles to himself.

Yuffie blinks as a thought crosses her mind, "This sounds familiar."

"Uh huh.." Cloud agrees tiredly.

Yuffie's brows lower as she notices him falling asleep. She picks up a rock that's sitting next to her. A mischievous grin spreads across her face. She closes one eye and raises her hand that's holding the rock up so she can aim. Her tongue slips out of her mouth as she concentrates. With one quick flick of her wrist she sends her stone flying across the fire and hit Cloud in the forehead.

"YEOW!" Cloud jumps to his feet, rubbing his forehead. Yuffie clutches her stomach, laying on her back as she laughs at Cloud. "WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO THAT FOR!?" Cloud yells.

Yuffie stops laughing long enough to answer him, "Cuz you were gonna fall asleep."

"SO YOU THROW A ROCK AT ME!" Cloud yells.

"SHuDDUP OUT THERE! I'M TRYING TO SLEEP!" Barret yells out from inside his tent.

"Really I can't sleep with all this noise." Tifa says annoyed that she was woken up.

"Cloud could you please be quiet." Aerith asks from inside her tent.

"But.. I... she... threw a rock at me!" Cloud says defensively.

"I don give a damn. She can keep throwing them at yo as long as she remains quiet. Now shuddup!" Barret says, the sound of him falling down on his sleeping bag follows.

Yuffie contains her laughter, "Yea spikes. People are trying to sleep." Yuffie said. Cloud just glares at her. Yuffie let's out a happy breath, "I feel better now." Yuffie says grinning. Cloud rolls his eyes at the ninja.

Fifteen minutes later

"Bored. Bored. Bored. BORED." Yuffie complains.

Cloud sighs as he rubs his temples. Here he was, Ex- SOLDIER first- class, leader of the rebel group AVALANCHE, stuck with an annoying teenager. He'll have to remember not to assign himself watch duty with the female ninja ever again. He has no patience for energetic teenagers. "Just go to sleep." Cloud says wanting something that'll make her be quiet.

"Um..." Yuffie tapped her chin in thought, "Nah.. I'm not tired. Besides you're pretty fun to hang out with." Yuffie says amusingly.

"I thought you said you were bored." Cloud says.

Yuffie nods her head, "Oh yea. I am bored. But that doesn't stop me from having fun at the same time."

Cloud raises an eyebrow, "That made no sense."

Yuffie smiles, "I know."

Cloud rolls his head and shakes his head. 'I wish morning would come quicker.' He thinks to himself.

"I know a way to pass time quicker!" Yuffie suddenly exclaims.

"How?"

Yuffie grins like a manic and pulls out a deck of cards, she walks over towards Cloud and sits in front of him. "We can play cards!" She exclaims.

"Oh joy..." Cloud says sarcastically.

"I only play cards when there's money involved or some sort of deal or something." Yuffie explains.

"We'll go with a deal since the money needs to be used for supplies." Cloud says, then as an after thought he adds, "I'm dealer."

Yuffie shakes her head, "No I'm dealer."

"I don't trust you."

"And I don't trust you." Yuffie snaps back. "Tell you what, we'll play for it, a rock, paper scissors game. Whoever wins is dealer." Cloud shrugs his shoulders and holds out his fist. Yuffie raises her fist, "Okay. Rock, paper, scissors, shoot!"

Yuffie, "Rock"

Cloud, "Paper." Cloud smirks, "I won."

Yuffie shakes her head, "No, rock rips through paper." She begins shuffling the deck of cards.

"What!?" Cloud says. Yuffie just grins as she begins to deal the cards. Cloud just shakes his head, giving up with arguing.

"The game is poker, oh the stakes are um... whoever loses has to do something the other person says. This is for each hand that is played." Yuffie says explaining the rules.

"Fine." Cloud says then thinks, 'I can have her be quiet for the rest of the night and leave me alone.' He looks at his hand to see that he has three kings, he smirks.

"Want to exchange any cards?" Yuffie asks hiding her own smirk.

"Two." He says, giving her two cards. Yuffie gives him two cards.

"Ok what do you have?" Yuffie asks.

"Cloud raises an eyebrow, "Aren't you going to exchange?"

"Oh yea!" She exchanges one card. "Ok, now what do you have?"

Cloud smirks and shows his hand, "Three of a kind."

Yuffie frowns a bit a seeing his hand, she scratches the back of her head, "I only have two pair." She says without showing him her hand.

"Guess I win." Cloud says.

Yuffie smirks, "Not quite. I said I have two pair." She shows him her cards, revealing to him that she has two pairs of aces. Yuffie laughs as Cloud glares at her hand. "Now what will I make you do?"

Cloud rolls his eyes and waits for the order. Yuffie snaps her fingers, "I got it!" She says with an evil grin. She glances towards Cloud, "You like Tifa don't you?" She questions. Cloud raises an eyebrow, then shakes his head, "Then you like Aerith?" She asks. Cloud shakes his head again. Yuffie's brows raise in disbelief, "You mean you've been traveling with two women like that and you don't like either of them?" Cloud nods his head. Yuffie's cheeks puff up as she contains her laughter, "Oh... so you like Barret then?"

"NO!" Cloud replies quickly.

Yuffie laughs waving him off, "Ok I don't believe you. You got to like one of them so I'll just choose one. Let's see here.... Tifa's stronger then Aerith so I choose Tifa."

"What's all this about?" Cloud asks suddenly feeling very uncomfortable.

Yuffie grins, "I'm thinking about what I'm going to make you do....duh!... Ok.. this is what you'll have to do." Yuffie tells Cloud, the whole idea makes him blush in embarrassment.

Five minutes later inside Tifa's tent.

'I'm so going to get that ninja for this.' Cloud thinks as he stands still in his spot. He can already here the ninja's giggling from outside the tent. Cloud looks at Tifa's sleeping face, her arms are at her sides of the sleeping bag as she sleeps on her back,

"Do it!" Yuffie whispers from outside the tent.

Cloud covers his face with a hand, 'I'm never going to here the end of this from Tifa.' He thinks to him self as he walks over towards Tifa. As silently as he can places his feet on each side of her. He kneels down so his knees are on each side of her waist, 'Go this sucks.' Cloud thinks to himself. He places his hands on the floor of the tent, on each side of Tifa's head so his face is hovering above hers. He begins blowing into her face trying to wake her up.

Tifa groans tiredly and her face scrunches up as Cloud continues to blow into her face. She slowly opens her eyes. Her eyes lock onto the mako blue orbs hovering above her. "Cloud!?" She calls out in confusion, "What the hell are you doing?"

Cloud gives her a nervous smiles, 'Just say it and get out.' "H-hey baby" Cloud begins, his voce cracking in fear. "I can't help myself any longer." Cloud says, Tifa looks at him weirdly wondering if he's on drugs or something, "I can't deny it any longer. I need you so badly." Cloud says, "Come on Tifa I'll make your dreams come true." 'Oh my god I am so dead.... I'll die after I kill Yuffie though.' Cloud thinks to himself. He waits for the smack that he knows he'll receive.

Tifa blinks in confusion as she stares up at him wondering what he meant. Then it finally dawned on her what he was talking about. Cloud watches as Tifa's face turns bright red from what he guesses is most likely anger. Tifa raises her arms up, Cloud closes his eyes waiting to be punched. Instead he feels Tifa's arms snake around his neck and pull him down as she crushes her lips against his.

Cloud eyes widen in surprise, "WHOA!!!" Cloud exclaims once he jumps up to his feet.

Tifa looks at him in confusion, "Why'd you do that?" Tifa asks disappointed.

"Why did you do THAT!?" Cloud says. He can hear Yuffie walking away from the tent, faint choked laughter following her.

"You said you were going to make my dreams come true." Tifa said shyly.

Cloud eyes widen, "Whoa.. ok first thing Tifa I don't wanna know what those dreams are and secondly... you know what? Let's just forget I was even here. Goodnight, pleasant dreams." Cloud says as he slips out of the tent. Once he has the tent zipped back up he walks away, a chill going down his spine. Yuffie is near the fire, her hands trying to muffle out her laughter. Cloud shakes his head in disbelief, "God... Tifa is a fricking sicko."

Tears run down Yuffie face as she struggles to breath through her laughter, "That... worked.. out better then... I would of thought!" Yuffie takes a deep breath, calming herself down, "Ready for another hand?" Yuffie asks innocently.

Two minutes later

"I swear I'm not cheating!" Yuffie says suppressing a smirk that's threatening to appear across her face.

"Yea right." Cloud says frustrated, 'Like she'd actually get a real royal flush without cheating.' "What are you going to make me do this time?" Cloud asks, wanting to get it over with.

"Nothing, yet. I can't really think of anything right now. I'll make you do something some other time." Yufffie says before grinning. "Wanna play again?" She asks.

Cloud gives her a look, "No."

Yuffie rolls her eyes and puts her cards away, "Soar loser." She walks away to sit somewhere away from Cloud. She picks up a small twig and begins making doodles in the dirt again. She let's out a sigh, "Bored. Bored. Bored. BORED."

Cloud groans, "Could you STOP that?"

"You're the one who assigned me to watch duty with you." Yuffie points out.

"And it's never going to happen again." Cloud says, and meaning it.

Yuffie glances over to him, "Why'd you assign me for watch duty anyway?"

Cloud blinks a bit in thought, "Uh.. because I figured it'd get you into the swing of things."

Yuffie's eyes glance to the ground. Then a smirk spreads across her face as she looks over towards Cloud, "I think you're lying. You assigned me to have watch duty with you because you have the hots for me." Yuffie declares.

Cloud raises an eyebrow at her. The smirk widens across Yuffie's face as she stands up and begins walking back over to Cloud, "I can't blame you though. I mean, what man can resist my beauty? Nyuk! Nyuk! Nyuk!"

"You laugh like a jackass." Cloud points out, an amused smile spreading across his face.

Yuffie pauses in thought. She leans down so she's eye level with Cloud. She grins at him, making him raise an eyebrow, "You're just trying to change the subject. But you can't hide the fact you wanna kiss me. I can see it in your eyes. You are so desperately in love with me." Yuffie says laughing a bit.

Cloud snorts disgusted, "Oh yea I sure am. I just wish you had the dreams that Tifa has about me." The same chill goes down his spine at the thought.

Yuffie straightens up and smirks, "Kiss me." She says.

Cloud raises an eyebrow, "Um... no"

The smirk widens, "That's what I'm telling you to do for losing the hand in poker. So you got to do it." 'Nyuk! Nyuk! Nyuk! Messing with people is fun.'

Cloud rubs his chin in thought as he looks at her. Shrugging his shoulders he stands up and smiles down at Yuffie. "Ok. Fine. If that's what you're going to make me do then I'll do it." Cloud says as he wraps his arms around Yuffie's waist, pulling her closer to him.

"Um.. uh.. heh heh." Yuffie fumbles with words as her face heats up, 'GAWD I was just joking!' She stares into Cloud's eyes as he leans down. 'Oh what the hell.' She lifts her head up and closes her eyes.

Cloud smirks at her and kisses her forehead before pulling away. "There. Now you have nothing on me."

Yuffie blinks in confusion, "What the hell was that!?" She asks angrily.

Cloud smirks, "You told me to kiss you. So I did. You didn't specify where I had to."

Yuffie's eye twitches, "You're a dumbass!" She walks away and plops down on the ground. Cloud laughs enjoying Yuffie's annoyance.

Five minutes later

"Bored. Bored. Bored. BORED!" Yuffie says.

Cloud groans in frustration, 'Watch duty sucks!'

Heh heh heh.. ok y'all that's it. Sorry if character are OOC but this was simply a stupid little thing I typed out of shear boredom. So what did you think? Good? Bad? No comment? Want me to write more? LOL Maybe if I feel really bored and dumb I will.


	2. Evil Crickets And Marshmallows

I seriously can't believe that there's people out there that enjoyed this lol. Well, since a few of you asked me to continue with this, I've decided to try another chapter. I hope y'all realize that this fic doesn't have any sort of plot whatsoever. Now let me think... where and when should this one be taking place? Um... I'll say, in the plain of Rocket Town, after the group goes through Mt. Nibel for the first time. Alrighty then, let's see what I can make of this heh heh.

Disclaimer- Nope.. still don't own Final Fantasy Seven.

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Evil Crickets And Marshmallows

_Eep..eep...eep.. eep. _Fists clench the sleeping bag tightly in the person's annoyance. _Eep..eep..eep..eep.._ Eyes narrow in the darkness as the person continues to listen to the little obnoxious bugs outside her tent. She tries to block out the sound by covering her head with her sleeping bag. _Eep..eep...eep...eep._ Yuffie growls in anger as she uncovers her head and sits up. It's now official, she won't be getting any sleep with all those little annoying evil cricket's 'Eep' echoing constantly through her head. If she could, she'd gather all the little bugs up in one large group and burn their little bug asses with a Fire2 spell. _Eep...eep...eep...eep._ Yuffie's eye twitches, crickets are now on the top of her 'Things That I Hate Most List'.

Yuffie shuffles out of her sleeping bag muttering something about 'evil crickets' under her breath. Walking over to the entrance of her small tent she unzips the door and walks out. Turning around she zips the tent back up, not wanting to let any of the 'evil crickets' inside of her tent where they'd be able to crawl all over her if she decides to go back and try to get some sleep. Turning around she looks over to the fire burning in the middle of their campsite. A certain spiky blonde swordsman is kneeled in front of it, as he pokes the fire absentmindedly with a stick.

"Can't sleep?" Cloud asks, not even bothering to turn to look who came out.

Yuffie brows lower in annoyance, "How can anyone with all those annoying crickets out there!?" Yuffie huffs as she walks towards the fire where it'll be warmer.

Cloud gives out a short laugh. Yuffie looks around the campfire, "Isn't there supose to be two people on watch duty at a time?" Yuffie asks, noticing that Cloud is alone.

Cloud nods, yawning a bit, "Vincent's out circling the area for any monsters nearby. I told him it wasn't necessary but he replied with his usual answer, (.....) and walked off." Cloud explains.

Yuffie's face scrunches up in discomfort, "Man is Vincent ever weird! I never met someone so.. so... depressing then him!" Yuffie clears her throat, "Don't look at me, I have sinned, I don't deserve to be with anyone, how about I go and just jump back in my dirty, moldy, smelly, coffin for another few decades until I have repent for crimes I have committed that no one cares to hear!" Yuffie says using a poor imitation of Vincent's voice.

"........" Cloud decides to just keep out of the conversation, not finding it very safe to get into. Believe it or not, the dark enigma know as Vincent Valentine kind of freaks Cloud out a bit. He'd rather not have him overhear anything Cloud says about him. He's rather not get shot in the ass or have him release the Galion Beast to bite his head off.

When the energetic ninja doesn't say anything else, Cloud turns his gaze from the fire to Yuffie. A teasing grin spreads across his face, "Cute pajamas." Cloud comments, giving a small chuckle.

Yuffie glances down at what she's wearing and blushes in embarrassment, pink pajamas with little white moogles scattered across them. She forgot that she was wearing them, "They're not mine! they're Tifa's!" Which is the truth, these aren't exactly Yuffie's type of clothing but her own pajama's haven't been washed in who knows how long that the smell is actually giving her a headache when she wears them.

"Uh-huh sure." Cloud says smirking a bit as he turns his gaze back to the fire and pokes it with a stick again.

"Oh what do I care!" Yuffie exclaims, "This is coming from someone who's pajamas are most likely just his boxers!"

"Actually.." Cloud pauses as he rolls a log in the fire with the stick in his hand. "I sleep naked."

From the tone of his voice, Yuffie can't tell whether he's joking or not. She stared at Cloud for a moment as her mind begins to wonder, she pictures Cloud in his tent with nothing covering him other then his sleeping bag. Yuffie's face heats up, 'Eww.... GAWD! Why the HELL did I just picture him like that!?' A chill runs down her spine.

Cloud glances over to Yuffie and raises an eyebrow at the expression across his face. Cloud shakes his head in disbelief, "I was joking Yuffie." Cloud says.

"I KNEW that!" Yuffie immediately replies.

Cloud contains the smirk that threatens to appear across his face, "Oh really? Cuz I was just lying, I really DO sleep naked. It's rather more comfortable." Cloud rubs his mouth with his hand as he hides his smile that appears on his face from Yuffie's expression. His brows raise in amusement, "You should give it a try sometime." Cloud suggests, keeping his voice as neutral as possible.

"I. Think. Not." Yuffie says slowly, making sure that he understands her. She sticks her tongue out in disgust, "I did not need to know about how you sleep, you know?"

Cloud shrugs uncaringly, "You brought the subject up." He points out.

Cloud follows Yuffie with his eyes as she stands up and walks over to one of the group's packs sitting near one of the tents. She opens one up and digs through its contents. Cloud raises a questioning eyebrow, "What're you doing." Yuffie pulls out what she was looking for and turns around, holding it up to show Cloud, a grin spread across her face.

"Marshmallows?" Cloud questions.

Yuffie rolls her eyes, "Well sorry if I'm hungry and since you got a fire going I might as well find some use for it since I'm not asleep."

"You wouldn't be hungry if you had eaten before." Cloud points out.

"Well SO sorry that I didn't eat that crap that you cooked, telling everyone that it's food when it looked like a pile of chocobo dung!" Yuffie exclaims as she walks back over to the fire. As she passes Cloud, she snatches the stick out of his hand.

"It was stew Yuffie. I told you that before. You're the only one who had a problem with it." Cloud says seemingly insulted.

Yuffie opens the bag of marshmallow, "I'll also be the only one without food poisoning for the rest of the week." She raises an eyebrow as she thinks of something. "I don't remember seeing you eat any of that crap you ate." Yuffie says as she puts her Marshmallow in the fire.

Cloud gives a half-smile, "I wasn't hungry." Cloud replies.

Yuffie laughs, "You're full of it." She says pulling her marshmallow out of the fire, the marshmallow itself is on fire though as it turns into a puffy black marshmallow. She blows on it to put the small fire on her marshmallow out. She brings the tip of her stick to her mouth and places the marshmallow in her mouth, "Mmm..." Her face scrunches up in disgust as she eats the marshmallow, "This is SO good. It tastes just like a piece of charcoal!" Yuffie says sarcastically.

Cloud shakes his head, laughing a bit, "You're suppose to hold it above the fire, not directly in it!"

Yuffie sticks another marshmallow on the tip of her stick. She raises her arm up and holds it right above the flames. It starts to turn a golden brown before it catches on fire. Yuffie brings the stick back and blows the fire out on the black marshmallow. She places the black marshmallow in her mouth and eats it. She shrugs her shoulders at Cloud, "It still tastes like a piece of charcoal" Yuffie states.

Cloud places a hand across his face and shakes his head, "You're not suppose to let it turn black. Don't let it catch on fire." Cloud advises.

Yuffie sticks another marshmallow on her stick and sticks it right above the flames again. It soon turns golden brown, a second later it's on fire. Yuffie quickly pulls it back blowing the fire out. Too late, it's already burned. She eats the marshmallow, "Who knows? If I keep this up I may start liking the taste of charcoal." Yuffie says placing another marshmallow on the stick and placing it above the fire.

Cloud watches as Yuffie concentrates on trying to not catch her marshmallow on fire. Cloud turns his gaze to the marshmallow and watches it turn a golden brown. The marshmallow begins to catch on fire. Yuffie gasps and shakes the stick quickly trying to put the fire out. The marshmallow slides off the stick and hits Cloud in the face. Yuffie sucks in her lips to hold back her laughter as Cloud wipes the melted marshmallow off his face with his hand. He glares at Yuffie before standing up and stepping over to her. He snatches the stick out of her hand and sits down. He grabs the bag of marshmallow and places one on the stick.

"This is how you do it!" Cloud says in annoyance as he holds the marshmallow above the fire. He rotates the marshmallow, making it turn a golden brown all around before pulling it away from the fire and waving it in Yuffie's face, "See? That isn't too hard is it?" Yuffie shakes her head before slowly reaching for the marshmallow. Before she's able to get her hands on it, Cloud pops it in his mouth and grin, "Mmm.. now that's a GOOD marshmallow."

Yuffie shoots him a glare as he places another marshmallow on the stick. This time he shoves the marshmallow straight into the fire, "Since I know you're a slow learner," Cloud says earning himself another glare, "I'll teach you a trick about cooking marshmallows." Cloud pulls the marshmallow out and blows the fire out on the black marshmallow. Cloud gently grabs the marshmallow between his thumb and middle finger. He pulls the surface of the black marshmallow off leaving the white melted inside on the stick. He throws the burned part back into the fire and eat the rest of the marshmallow. "That's not hard to do is it?" Cloud asks.

Yuffie rolls her eyes as she watches Cloud as he cooks another marshmallow above the fire again, rotating the stick to make sure he turns the entire marshmallow a golden brown. He surprises Yuffie when he hold the marshmallow up to her mouth. Yuffie blinks a bit before opening her mouth enough for him to put the marshmallow in her mouth. She closes her mouth and he slides the stick out. Yuffie chews the cooked marshmallow and smiles when she swallows it, "That one was better tasting then charcoal." Yuffie says as a compliment.

Cloud slowly nods his head as he focuses on cooking another marshmallow. When it's a golden brown he holds it up to Yuffie's mouth again for her to take. Yuffie tilts her head to the side, "Aren't you going to eat it?" She asks curiously.

Cloud shakes his head, "I'm not hungry." He replies quietly. Yuffie shrugs and eats the marshmallow. Cloud places another marshmallow on the stick again. He places it above the fire, a moment later they here a gunshot. "Sounds like Vincent found something." Cloud comments.

"Shouldn't we go help him?" Yuffie asks.

Cloud gives a short laugh, "The monsters in these areas are weak. Vincent can take care of himself."

Yuffie shrugs and stands up giving a yawn. She turns around, "Well time to go see if I can get back to sleep. Night Cloud." Yuffie places her hand on his shoulder as she walks away.

Cloud turns around a bit, "Goodnight." He says as she goes into her tent. He turns his gaze to the marshmallow that's now on fire. "SH!" He pulls the marshmallow out of the fire and blows out the fire on it. After looking at the puffy black marshmallow a moment, he shrugs and pops it into his mouth, its not like a little charcoal will kill him.

Yuffie climbs back into her sleeping bag and sighs as she gets comfortable. She closes her eyes as sleep slowly overcomes her. _Eep...eep...eep...eep._ Yuffie's eyes snap open. _Eep...eep...eep...eep._ She growls in annoyance at the 'evil crickets' outside her tent. An idea crosses her mind, causing a smirk to play across her lips. Reaching over to the side of the tent she picks up her Twin Viper and grabs one of the green materias in its slot. If the 'evil crickets' won't be quiet, she'll just outsmart them. Concentration on the green orb, she whispers out the spell, "Sleepel." And falls into a deep sleep that even the 'evil crickets' won't be able to awaken her from.

Heh heh heh. I don't even wanna know why I actually wrote more to this. OR stayed up this late to do it. It's 3:13 in the morning. (Shakes head) I need to get a life. Well it was somewhat fun typing it up, I did the whole marshmallow bit since I'm going camping with my Ma this weekend. I especially liked one part in this chapter. When Yuffie said, 'Mmm... This is SO good. It tastes just like a piece of charcoal.' Heh heh. I don't know why I found that funny. Oh and I apologize for bashing Vincent a bit. I don't hate him, matter of fact he's one of my favorite characters, probably because of how morbid and mysterious and demonic looking he is. Heh heh. Well never know. I might make another update to this sometime. Till then, Review! TTNC!


	3. Cloud Gets His Revenge, Sort Of

Well it happened again y'all. Writer's block sucks... Actually it's not really writer's block. I just don't have much motivation to update my other fics. I don't know, they're so old and long, it's becoming boring to write, ever have one of those days? Well anyways, I was going to start a new fic, even though I have like eight incomplete ones as it is (Holy crap!) Then I remembered that I have this! You guys seemed to like this, though I think I lost my humor after the first chapter lol. That's the funniest I can get, it's actually quite pathetic really. Well anyways, let's see how this one turns out, nay?

Disclaimer- Hmm... If I had a penny for every time I had to type this I'd almost have a dollar by now.

Scene- Takes place after AVALANCHE gets the Key Stone.

Warning- Uh... this chapter may not be suitable for little kids who can't take a swear word, well, a lot of them since we have the good Ole Pilot Cid in this chapter heh heh heh.

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Cloud Gets His Revenge, Sort Of

Cloud sits up from his sleeping bag for what seems like the hundredth time that night. No matter how hard he tries, he just can't seem to get to sleep, the thought of the Temple Of Ancients being just a few miles away is really starting to get to him. Deciding he won't being getting any sleep tonight, he gets out of his sleeping bag, and grabs the pile of clothing at his side. An amused smile crosses his lips as he remembers the expression on a certain ninja's face when he told her that he sleeps naked, although it was a few weeks ago, he still finds her reaction quite amusing.

Snapping the last piece of armor on, although he doesn't even know why he bothered putting them on, he heads out of his tent. Cloud tilts his head to the side as he raises an eyebrow at Cid. Cloud can hardly believe it, he obviously lost the bet against Yuffie. The bet between the two was whether or not Cid smokes in his sleep. And there he is, his arms crossed, his eyes closed, and his mouth slightly open with a lit cigarette dangling between his lips. Cloud doesn't even want to know how the pilot is able to do that.

Walking over to the pile of wood the group collected before making camp, he throws a few logs into the small fire, giving the starving fire more food. He stands next to the fire as the wood crackles and pops. Walking to the other side of the fire where a large log sits, Barret dragged it over so they had something to sit on, rather than the ground. Cloud glances around the campsite, realizing that there's suppose to be another person on watch duty. But the only one tonight is Cid and he's sleeping. 'Who else suppose to be on watch duty?' Cloud thinks to himself.

The snapping of a twig, causes Cloud to glance over to his right, his brows raises in surprise as Yuffie staggers towards him, clutching her stomach and her face a lovely shade of green. "Urgh... I'm dieing." Yuffie comments before literally falling into Cloud's lap, causing him to fall backwards off the log, and taking the ninja with him. "I don't feel so good." Yuffie says from on top of you get off of me?" Cloud asks, feeling a bit uncomfortable with her sprawled across him, especially since it looks like she's about to vomit at any moment.

Yuffie clutches his shirt tightly in her fists as she tries to hide her face in his chest, "I think I'm going to puke." She replies sickly. "Urk!"

Quicker than humanly possible, Cloud jumps to his feet, literally throwing Yuffie three feet away from him before she spoils his clothes. When she hits the ground he hears laughter coming from Cid, than Yuffie begins laughing as she pushes herself to her feet, confusing the blonde swordsman to no end. "What's... going on?" Cloud asks confused.

"I got you!" Yuffie announces, than turns triumphantly towards Cid, "There! We had to wait forever for someone to come out, but I did it! Now we can go with the next hand."

"Next hand?" Cloud repeats confused. His answer comes in the form of a deck of cards being pulled out of Cid's pockets. Realization dawns on Cloud as he realizes what they're talking about. Apparently, Yuffie had convinced Cid to play poker with her, and evidently, the stakes are the same from when she played against him the first night she joined the group. But of course, he's still convinced that she cheated that night. "You're playing poker."

Cid smirks to himself, "Damn straight, the first hand was dealt an hour ago, I fucking won it but we had to wait for one of you lazy asses to get up and out of the tent so she could do what I told her."

Yuffie gives a smirk of her own as she inches her way towards Cloud, "You want to join in the game?"

"No." Cloud replies immediately.

"What's the matter, too much of a fucking sissy to play a game of poker?" Cid asks while he shuffles the deck.

"Yuffie cheats." Cloud answers.

"What? I dun cheat. You just suck." Yuffie replies. Cloud crosses his arms and gives her a knowing look. Yuffie crosses her own arms, trying to mimic Cloud, "If I cheat, than Cid wouldn't of been able to beat me."

Now that he thought about it, he did say he'd get his revenge for Yuffie making Cloud crawl into Tifa's tent that night, the memory of what happened than still makes a chill go down his spine, he hasn't looked at Tifa in the same prospective since than. Plus, from what it looks like, Cid is the dealer, so Yuffie wouldn't be able to cheat, hopefully. Giving a defeated sigh Cloud sits back down, "Fine I'll play." He announces.

Yuffie grins from ear to ear, "Well now that there's three players, the game changes a bit, the person who wins the hand, chooses one of the other two to do something, and the dealer is changed each hand."

Cloud nods his head in understanding. Cid flicks his cigarette off to the side, before puling out another one and lighting it up. "Since this is a new game, I'll deal first." He deals out the cards and each looks at their hands. After exchanging what cards they didn't want to see, they were ready. "What's your fucking hand brat?" Cid asks.

Yuffie shoots him a dirty look for at the name brat before showing her two pair. Cid turns his gaze to Cloud, "Well blondie?" Cloud scratches the back of his head and chuckles embarrassedly before showing his hand, which contained nothing but an Ace high card. Cid raises an eyebrow at the hand, "You officially suck at this game."

"I was trying to go for a flush." Cloud says defensively.

Cid looks at the hand again, "You only have two cards that have the same fucking suite!"

Cloud scratches the back of his head, "Yea well.. I didn't have anything better to go for."

"Alright Mr. Smokestack, stop stalling, show us your hand." Yuffie says, getting impatient.

Cid scratches his chin before putting down three twos, followed by a smirk, "Guess I won." Yuffie crosses her arms and gives a huff. Cloud rolls his eyes before putting his cards in the discard pile. Cid glances back and forth between the two, "Well, since I already got the brat to do something, and she's not old enough to do this next thing." Yuffie raises an eyebrow at the comment. "I choose blondie here. And I order you to buy me a carton of cigarettes at the next town we go to."

Cloud shrugs his shoulder, "Ok." He answers uncaringly, he'd rather buy a carton of cigarettes than do something Yuffie has in mind.

"Cloud!" Yuffie leans in and begins whispering in his ear, giving glances over to Cid. When she's finished, Cloud grins and nods his head, followed by Yuffie snickering. Cid glances between the two suspiciously before handing the deck to Yuffie. Yuffie can't help but grin as she deals out the cards.

__

After each show their hands

"I win!" Yuffie chimes. Cid gives a few words of his own before tossing his cards in the pile. Cloud's smiling the entire time, knowing what's coming up next. "I pick Mr. Smokestack." Yuffie says immediately.

Cid smirks to himself, "Yea, give me your worse you fucking brat." He challenges.

"My worst huh?" Yuffie says thoughtfully, she can't help but let the grin on her face widen, "Every time you curse you have to give Cloud and I a hundred Gil!" She says triumphantly.

"What!? You can't fucking do that!" Cloud and Yuffie hold out their hands. Cid clamps his mouth shut, preventing the string of curses that threaten to come out. He digs into his pocket and gives the two fifty Gil each.

"Uh... I said a hundred, as in a hundred each." Yuffie says.

Cid hands them another fifty Gil, "This is fucking bullshit." Cloud and Yuffie's hands go right back out. "GOD DAMNIT!" Cid shouts digging in his pockets to hand them, now, three hundred Gil each. In the course of one minute he already lost eight hundred Gil. If he keeps this up, he'll be selling all he has. He'll just win the next hand and make Yuffie take back what she said.

Yuffie grins as she pockets the money before glancing over to Cloud, "Well that ought a be more than enough for the cigarettes." She comments. Cloud chuckles himself before taking the deck of cards and reshuffling them. If Cid can't handle the no cursing thing, wait until he loses next hand.

__

Once everyone has their hands

"Pair of Aces" Yuffie shows her hand.

Cid smirks, "I got three Kings. I win, Now I choose you brat to take back what you said."

Yuffie shakes her head, "You didn't let Cloud show his hand." Yuffie points out.

Cid rolls his eyes, "Like he ever fucking wins." Cloud and Yuffie hold out their hands. Cid growls but doesn't make a comment as he reaches into his pocket to hand them another hundred each. "Alright so what did you fucking have." Another hundred each.

Cloud scratches the side of his head as he stares at his hand in thought he puts down three Queens, Cid smirks, knowing his three Kings beats his three Queens, that is until Cloud also puts down two Jacks, "Full house." Cloud announces triumphantly.

"God Damnit!" Cid shouts, Cloud and Yuffie hold out their hands, "God Damnit!" Cid says again before reaching in is pocket to get four hundred Gil, two hundred for each of them.

Cloud pockets money and grins, "I'll choose... Cid!" He says. Cid crosses his arms inhaling the smoke of his cigarette as he waits for Cloud to tell him what to do. Cloud leans forward and plucks the cigarette out of Cid mouth, followed by taking the pack of cigarettes that are tucked in Cid's visor, "You can't smoke."

"Oh that's good." Yuffie comments immediately.

"WHAT!?" Cid shouts, jumping to his feet, "YOU CAN'T FUCKING DO THAT! THAT'S FUCKING NUTS! THAT'S BULLSHIT, WHAT KIND OF SHIT ARE YOU FUCKING PULLING YOU MOTHERFUCKER, I FUCKING SWEAR I'LL SHOVE MY FUCKING SPEAR SO FAR UP YOUR FUCKING SCRAWNY ASS YOU FUCKING PRICK! THIS IS FUCKING BULLSHIT!"

When he's down shouting, Cloud and Yuffie are several feet away from him, finding it smart to put some distance between themselves and Cid in his tirade. After a moment, Yuffie turns to Cloud, "How many was that."

Cloud shakes his head, "I have no idea, I lost track."

Cid continues to curse as he walks away from the campsite, needing some fresh air, although, he's already outside, he just needs to get away from the group before he accidentally throws a dynamite at the two. "Guess he quits." Yuffie says amusedly. "Well..." She turns her gaze back to Cloud, "How about one more hand?" Cloud shrugs his shoulders and they walk back to the campfire to play one last hand.

Yuffie snickers to herself as she deals the cards, Cloud himself, doesn't seem affected by her snickering, just keeping calm expression on his face, "How many you want?" Yuffie asks.

Cloud takes one card out his hand and tosses it to her. Yuffie raises an eyebrow, "You just want one?" She asks confused.

"Yup" Cloud replies.

"Well, don't you want to get rid of the crappy cards?" Yuffie asks.

"That was the 'crappy' card, as you call it" Cloud says, keeping his tone neutral.

Yuffie brows lower in thought, 'I could of sworn I dealt him a pair of two, a eight, six, and a jack.' "Are you trying to bluff me?" Yuffie asks.

Cloud raises an eyebrow at her, "Why would I do that? It's not like I lose anything if I lose the hand."

Yuffie shakes her head, "Fine, it's your choice." Yuffie says as she gives him a card, then exchanging two of her own. She smirks at her hand. "Three of a kind." Yuffie announces triumphantly, as she smirks at Cloud. Cloud gives a smirk of his own as he shows her his own hand. Yuffie's mouth hangs open as she stares at the four Aces in his hand, 'How the hell... I didn't give him that, I'm sure of it!'

Cloud grins as he taps his finger on his chin, while trying to think of something good. Cloud snaps his fingers, "I got it!" He begins chuckling to himself.

"What?" Yuffie asks a bit uncertain.

"You have to sleep naked for the next month."

"What!?" Yuffie face heats up.

"I'm joking." Cloud laughs.

Yuffie crosses her arms and waits.

"You seem to like kisses." Cloud says suddenly.

"Huh?" Yuffie says confused.

"Well there was the first night, where you made me kiss. Then there was last night where you dragged me all over Gold Saucer and then kissed me on the tram ride." That comment makes Yuffie's face heat up a bit, "So... I want you to go into." Cloud takes a moment to laugh, "Vincent's tent and kiss him... on the lips."

"Are you crazy!?" Yuffie shrieks, "I'm not kissing a vampire much less a person who'll shoot me for it!" She says waving her hands above her head frantically.

Cloud smirks, "Well, you made me go into Tifa tent making her think I want to..." Cloud shudders, "So I'm making you do that. Unless the so called Greatest Female Ninja is afraid."

"Fine!" Yuffie says jumping to her feet and begin heading towards Vincent's tent. Cloud covers his mouth, trying to conceal the amused grin that's across his face. Yuffie, as quietly as she can, unzip the black tent and sneaks into Vincent's tent. She stands next to the silent Vincent and immediately a problem appears. His cloak. It covers half his face. Though she always wondered what his face looks like, she'd rather not find out that he's some ugly crippled old man just before she kisses him. 'Eww... Gawd, he better not turn out to be like a skeleton.'

She grasps his cloak firmly with one hand as she gets down on her knees. She closes her eyes and leans down as she pulls his cloak away from his face. Yuffie opens her eyes as she kisses him to see Vincent staring at her with wide crimson eyes. She quickly pulls away, forgetting her grip on his cloak until she tears it. She backs away as Vincent jumps to his feet and glares at her. If looks could kill, she'd be dead, but than again, Vincent doesn't need to kill with looks since he's got his gun.

And to Yuffie, she just realized a few things. One, she isn't paying attention to the fact that Vincent had picked her up by the waist of her shorts and is carrying her out. Two, her face has never felt so hot before. The last thing she realized is that, under all the layers of clothing and the face concealed underneath the cloak which happens to be Vincent's, is that it's not an old man's or a skeletons. 'Hot! Hot! Hot! Hot!' Yuffie thinks to herself. 'Oh my GAWD! I just kissed a really HOT guy!' Yuffie thinks just before she hits the ground outside of Vincent's tent. The sound of Vincent's tent being zipped up shakes her out of her thoughts.

Cloud is chuckling as he walks over to Yuffie, "Well?" He asks.

Yuffie glances up at Cloud from the ground, her eyes wide, "Vinnie is fricken hot!" She squeals.

The grin on Cloud's face drops, "What?"

"Oh my Gawd! I think I died and went to heaven! Mmm... Vinnie." Cloud raises an eyebrow. "Now if only he didn't have demons lurking in his body, an ugly ass claw, and if only he wasn't a maniac depressant. If he wasn't those I'd stalk him the rest of my life!" Yuffie announces. "But since he has a personality as a lump on a log." Yuffie nods her head, "I can see why that Lucrecia chick dumped him."

__

GGGRRRRRRR

The next thing Cloud knows is that Yuffie is running for dear life as the Galion Beast chases her out of the campsite roaring through the night. Crossing his arms behind his head he heads back towards the fire, 'Watch duty isn't that bad.' He decides.

Well everyone, there ya go. Hmm let me think, first chapter, good. Second, alright. This one, longer, but doesn't have much humor, a few here and there. Oh well, at least I had something to do to pass the time right? Heh heh heh. Well if there's still anyone reading this, review and tell me what ya think. TTNC!


	4. Grieving, Stolen Kisses

It's that time again people! I am absolutely positively bored. And I got writer's block for all my other fics.... Cough... writer's block.. yeah right... truth is... I'm lacking in motivation to continue writing. I don't know.. I've been writing for maybe a little over a year now and I'm just not up to it as much as I used to. I'm becoming slower and slower with my updates, and I'm starting new fics without finishing up my old ones. Well.. enough of my complaining. You all came here to read the next chapter.

WARNING This chapter is going to be a bit... different compared to the rest. It's not going to have much humor in it. It's going to have a more uh.. serious outlook, really... I'll try and see if I can squeeze some humor in, but I don't really see how in the situation... Y'all find out why soon enough.

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Grieving, Stolen Kisses

'I can't seem to stop them from flowing. How long have I been crying now? I've just been laying here on my sleeping bag for the past hour and a half. Luckily, the howling wind outside my tent blocks out my occasional sniffle. Damn that bastard! How can he possibly kill someone as innocent, so caring as Aeris? He has no heart. He's a heartless bastard. And when we catch up to him, I swear I'll shove my Twin Viper so far up that Pretty Boy's ass that his eyes will bulge out of damn his skull!'

Such were the thoughts of the grieving ninja. Yuffie, obviously not finding any way of getting to sleep, sits up from her sleeping bag and just stays in her spot, in the darkness, for a few moments. As the coldness of the night catches up to her, her teeth begin to chatter, making her picture a beaver chewing away a tree in her mind. Grabbing her sleeping bag, she wraps it around herself in hopes of regaining some heat. 'Stupid frigging Northern Continent, always being covered in the stupid snow. I'm FREEZING!'

Yuffie rubs her eyes with the back of her hand as she sniffles once more. The death of their dear friend had struck the group hard. While the rest of the group managed to stay strong, Yuffie broke down into tears. 'Just like a child.' She thinks shamefully. She thought she was strong, being a ninja should mean she can take anything thrown at her. But she was wrong, she isn't strong, she's weak, or at least that's what she believes.

'I'd be warmer near the fire... that is.. if there is a fire.' She knows that Cloud is outside on watch. He assigned himself watch duty, and told everyone else to get rest. She knew it was his own way to get some privacy. And he probably needs it too. But at the moment, Yuffie could careless if he wanted to be left alone or not because quite frankly, she's freezing her butt of with just her kaki shorts and green turtleneck tank top. Let's not forget her sleeping bag too! Although it doesn't seem to be helping her any.

With the thought of the warm fire set firmly in her mind. Yuffie makes her way out of her tent. Unzipping the entrance, she steps out of the tent. Her gray eyes immediately gaze up at the starlit sky. In the Northern Continent, with very little inhabitants and artificial lighting, the stars seem more visible. Of course, the stars would be more visible there than anywhere else, after all, they're in the middle of nowhere. The starlit sky, which would usually be a beautiful scene to the young ninja, only makes her envious. 'A perfect night for a dreadful day,' She thinks bitterly.

She blinks out of her gaze at the sound of scraping metal. Her gaze falls down to the blonde swordsman that's sitting across the fire. His head bowed down as he sharpens his Rune Blade. Yuffie stares, captivated, as she watches the grinding stone in Cloud's hand go down the length of the blade, the sound of stone grinding on metal echoing in the night. Yuffie's surprised that she didn't hear from inside her tent, but then again, she was probably too preoccupied with her thoughts to have noticed.

Hesitantly, Yuffie heads towards the fire, her sleeping bag still wrapped around her shoulders as she walks up to the dancing flames. Cloud doesn't make any sort of acknowledgement as Yuffie takes a seat next to him. He remains silent, still, only his arm moving across his blade, as his face remains overshadowed.

Yuffie, for once, remains silent as well as she stares into the flames. She's always liked fire, in a strange kind of way. When she was younger, she always used to play with fire, and occasionally make them in Wutai, although she'd end up getting in trouble considering the fact that she only knew how to make one, but didn't know how to control one. She ended up burning half of her father's place down at one time. She never saw her father more angry than he was back then, to say he was 'mad' would be an understatement, he was downright pissed off.

There's one thing Yuffie doesn't like about fires, and that's if you stare at a fire, you begin to recall a lot of things. She remembers Tifa saying something similar to Cloud when they were in Cosmos Canyon. They were all around the Eternal Candle, or whatever they call it. Cloud, who was strangely in a talkative mood that night, went around the bonfire and talked to each one of them. She tried convincing him to go steal materia with her, but he only chuckled and walks away. Yuffie often wonders what would of happened if he had decided to go along with it. Especially since she was actually joking about it.

Yuffie remembers the first time they all met, she had ambushed them in the forest outside of Junon, in an attempt to rob them. At first glance the group looked like a pathetic tourist group. Boy was she wrong, but she still thinks she won the match, not technically, but she managed to bring almost the entire group to their knees. In fact, it was Cloud who beat her, but he wouldn't have if she hadn't tripped over a root and was unguarded. She still says the root just sprouted out of the ground out of nowhere.

Yuffie gives a quiet sigh as she draws her knees up to her chest. She remembers when they were all at Gold Saucer after getting the Key Stone. They all had to spend the night in the Ghost Hotel. She was the unlucky one who got stuck rooming with Aeris and Tifa. She knew that both of them were watching each other like hawks throughout the night, waiting for the other to fall asleep so they can sneak out and snag a date with Cloud. Both had talked about it with her on separate occasions. How each wanted to go out on a date with Cloud. So to screw with both of them. She got up and asked Cloud out herself. Of course, they both didn't think that was what she was going to do when she left the room. But she did. And strangely enough, it was rather amusing. Especially seeing Cloud and his 'Of so great' acting skills on stage. The entire date would of been great if it wasn't for the tram ride, and the kiss she gave him, followed closely by the slap across the face.

Yuffie couldn't help but chuckle at the memory, causing Cloud to glance over at her for a brief moment before resuming what he was doing. 'He deserved it. Making me all embarrassed. Errrrgh! Why'd I kiss him anyways!? He's a spikey headed jerk!' Sure, he seemed alright in the beginning, but then she really found out how coldhearted he is when she stole everyone's materia. She was in tears while she explained to him why she needed the materia. He just says, 'I don't care about your hometown. I just want our materia back.' Ok.. maybe she was acting a bit, she's pretended to cry plenty of times in the past to get what she wanted. Maybe he saw through the act. But still... it was a bit coldhearted of him to just flat out tell her that he doesn't care.

Truth is, it hurt her more then he probably realizes. Sure she's pesky, annoying, and a brat, not to mention she stole their materia, leaving them in the middle of the mountains. But he still didn't have to say it like that. Okay, maybe she wouldn't have cared if anyone else said it to her, and maybe she does have a very small crush on Cloud. One that she can just ignore, since it's so small it's unnoticeable to even herself half the time.

'And maybe I'll take up smoking like gramps.' Yuffie thinks sarcastically. She knows she's just trying to fool herself, if not herself, then at least everyone around her. She's actually liked Cloud since the day she met him. It was when Cloud kissed her hand that she began to like him, true that was just the bet he lost from the poker game they played, but he proved to be quite fun to hang around with. When he isn't acting somewhat strange and hell bent on finding Sephiroth, he acts just like... well,. her somewhat. He can be just as childish, annoying, and mischievous as her, once he loosens up a bit. She's never really met someone as stiff as him.

Well, except for Vincent maybe, but he's an exception. Vincent acts like he has a large pole crammed way up his ass. 'But is he ever HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT!' Yuffie sighs. 'Now if he wasn't fifty something years old, and didn't sleep in a coffin and just flat out didn't seem like a vampire. His depressing nature is a turnoff too.' Really, talking to Vincent is as entertaining as talking to a rock, everything he talks about is just 'BORING!' It makes a good way to put her to sleep though. 'Hmm... Maybe I should wake him up and have him talk about his sins so I can get some sleep.... Than again... I choose to live.' She'd rather not have the psychopathic Hellmasker released on her. That guy's favorite pastime consists of chopping small defenseless animals into tiny little pieces with his rusty chainsaw. It sends shivers down Yuffie's spine just thinking about the thing.

Yuffie gives a started jump as the Rune Blade slams to the ground. "We leave at dawn." Cloud's quiet voice breaks through the silence. Yuffie merely gives a short nod of understanding. "You should get some sleep." He advises her.

Yuffie frowns a bit, "So should you."

"I'm not tired."

"Well what do you know? Neither am I!" Yuffie tightens her hold on her sleeping bag, trying to find a way to wrap herself in a cocoon of sorts. Where they are currently sitting, they're not too close to the fire. To be honest, they're not close at all. Where they are sitting the heat of the fire hasn't even melted the snow yet. It makes the young ninja wonder how Cloud can stand sitting in the cold for so long. She feels really cold and she's got her thick sleeping bag around her, in fact, she wouldn't be surprised if her lips were turning blue. "I'm cold." She announces out of the blue.

"Then move closer to the fire."

"There's no where to sit." Yuffie points out.

"You can sit on the ground."

"The ground is wet and muddy near the fire, or haven't you noticed."

"Then move the fire closer."

"........" Yuffie blinks a bit confused for a moment, "Where would I grab it to carry it?"

"You could always move this closer to the fire."

"Oh yeah... I can move a damn boulder all by myself. And you don't look like you'll get up and help."

"..... Then go back to your tent."

Yuffie rolls her eyes at the comment. "What a GREAT idea... instead being cold here, I can walk back twenty five feet to my tent and just freeze in there instead."

"You're acting like a child."

Yuffie's face puffs up as she holds back her yelling. "Well duh dumbass! I am sixteen. Technically, I am a child."

"You're a teen. Start acting like one."

"So you would rather me have raging hormones and be hell bent on trying to have sex with you." Not really what she wanted to say, but it works out just as well.

".......... Actually... That's hard to choose between."

"You do realize that your acting like a jackass, right."

"I have an excuse."

"Oh? And what excuse would that be?" Yuffie asks raising an eyebrow.

"Aeris is dead."

Yuffie clamps her mouth shut, stopping a comment that was about to be let loose. For a few seconds she forgot the events of the day... or yesterday by the looks of it. Than Cloud has to go and remind her about it. 'He didn't have to be so damn blunt about it.' The ninja thinks sadly. 'Great! Now I have that whole damn ordeal stuck in my head again.' Suddenly, two hands grab hold of her waist, seemingly coming out of nowhere; she can feel herself being lifted, "Ack!" And placed firmly in Cloud's lap. "What the hell are you doing!?" Yuffie asks in a low shout, keeping her face out of his view so he can't see how red it is. Cloud doesn't give a response as he wraps his arms around her waist, "Hello! Earth to Cloud. I asked you a damn question."

"Look.. I'd rather not listen to you complain about being cold anymore. So stop complaining." Cloud says in annoyance.

That's no problem for Yuffie, she isn't exactly cold anymore. As a matter of fact, it feels like a furnace was turned on inside of her. And she knows exactly why she feels so hot all of a sudden. 'Oh my GAWD! Eww... Damn hormones! Bad Yuffie... No thinking such thoughts of the group's leader... Hmm... I never realized how muscular his arms are, must be from handling his sword for so long... Goddamnit! I'm doing it again!' What a friend she is. Aeris just died, and instead of grieving over a dear friend, like a normal person would do, Yuffie is getting some rather disturbing images in her head, ones that she shouldn't be having.

And if not having to sit in Cloud's lap is bad enough, he seems to find it alright to rest his chin on her shoulder, making her even more uncomfortable. Yuffie just waits a few moments, thinking he'll lift his head back up, but when he doesn't seem to move, she decides to try an ask him to, "Um... Cloud?" She asks a bit uncertainly. She waits for his response, but doesn't get one. Turning her head to the side, she notices his eyes are closed, 'He can't possibly be asleep... in that position. Honestly.. it can't be comfortable. If he can sleep like this than he's more stranger then I first thought.'

For a few moments, Yuffie just stared at Cloud's face, taking in every detail in the light of the fire. She never could figure out how exactly each strand of his spiky blond hair seems to stay in one spot, never leaving the area. Actually... she never really understood much of his hairstyle at all! Who in their right mind would want a hairstyle that looked like someone took a weed whacker to it? Than again, she has to admit, it does suite him, makes him a bit more cuter too. One thing is for sure though, Cloud definitely doesn't have to worry about getting a bed head, he always has one to begin with.

'Hmm... I wonder if he uses a lot of hair gel to keep it spiky.' Yuffie can't help but wonder. She decides to figure out the mystery of Cloud's spiky hair once and for all. Snaking her hands out of her sleeping bag, and turning slightly in Cloud's lap, not enough to let his head slide off her shoulder, she reaches up to his hair and touches it. To her surprise, she finds out that he doesn't wear hair gel, it just stays like it by itself. She can run her fingers through the soft blonde spikes; his hair doesn't feel like it has a protective shell over it like hair gel would do.

Yuffie runs a lone finger down Cloud's jaw line and ever so softly touches her lips. Then a thought crosses her mind. Would she do it? Will she dare to take the risk. and steal a kiss from Cloud? Sure she kissed him once before, on the cheek. And he even kissed her hand the night they first met. But those were all fun and games. Could she actually gather enough nerves to go through with this mission? Damn straight she will, after all, She's the Greatest Female Ninja Ever, and she fears nothing.

Now if she could only tell her body to cooperate with her mind, because at the moment, she's completely frozen up. Of course, with Cloud resting his head on her shoulder does represent quite a problem. Maybe if she can snake out from under his chin without waking him up in the process. Very carefully, Yuffie began slipping out of Cloud's grasp, moving his hands to his sides. Carefully she lowered herself from his lap, letting her sleeping bag fall to the ground. Once free of his grasp she turns around and has to hold back a laugh. He just looks so strange sleeping the way he is. With his back leaned against the small tree that's growing behind the boulder, and his arms thrown at his sides with his head hunched down. She finds it quite amazing that he can remain asleep like that, but than again, she guesses it's because he hasn't slept any the entire night.

'Okay then...' Yuffie thinks to herself as she stares at Cloud's form. She doesn't know why she has the sudden urge to kiss him, well technically, it's not really sudden. She's been wanting to kiss him for awhile, all the way back to their little date in Gold Saucer. She was originally going to kiss him on the lips that night, but she chickened out and went for his cheek again. She's never actually kissed a guy before, on the lips that is, than again, she never really had a boyfriend, not that she actually had time for one. She's was wondering around for two years before she ran into AVALANCHE, not really wanting to return to Wutai, the place is so boring to her. So she never really had a chance for such a thing as a kiss.

The good thing is that Cloud is asleep and she won't have to worry about his reaction. What he doesn't know won't hurt him, or in this case, possibly her. Even just standing there starring at Cloud, thinking about kissing him makes her face heat up. She will go through with this though, she's come this far, she won't back down. Besides, it's not like a kiss is such a big deal, if he wakes up he'll probably just give her a strange look as she comes up with some smart ass excuse. So with that thought in mind, Yuffie very gently places her hands on each side of Cloud's face to lift his head up some. For a moment she stands there, biting her bottom lip, trying to fight back her nerves.

Yuffie closes her eyes and places a feather light kiss on Cloud's lips. Then she pulls away and looks at him to see if he woke up. 'He must be out for the count.' Cautiously, Yuffie glances around the campsite, to make sure everyone is inside their tents before leaning in and kissing Cloud again, this time with a little bit more force. For a brief second, Yuffie imagined Cloud's lips brushing against hers as well. That is, until she realized that they were, in fact, moving as well, and during the same second she realizes that she gets a finger jammed into her side, causing her to let out a shriek and jumps back nearly three feet. Only to find out that Cloud is awake, and doesn't seem to look to happy.

"Um.. I... uh.. that is.. you were asleep.... and I...uh you didn't... that was.." Yuffie couldn't seem to find her smart ass excuse, or form any whole sentences for that matter. Ok, so one of the reactions she wasn't expecting from Cloud is for him to become pissed, because he didn't seem like the type that would get angry over such a thing. So it really wasn't much of a surprise when his glare disappeared as he began chuckling, and soon he was clutching his stomach with tears rolling down his face as he tried to muffle out his own laughter. All at Yuffie's expense. She's never felt so embarrassed in her life, she new her face is red, but quite frankly, she couldn't care less.

Cloud managed to pull off the most logical thing that would happen when rolling around, he fell off the boulder and into the snow. When he finally managed to calm himself down enough to speak, he puts his hands behind him and sits up, still chuckling some, "You... should have seen your face.... priceless!"

Yuffie gives a growl of frustration before marching over to him, and very simply put, whacked him in the back of the head. "Spiky-headed jerk!" She shouts as she walks away towards her tent, her sleeping bag in her hand.

Cloud only begins to chuckle more. He doesn't know how Yuffie does it. But she always seems to brighten him up one way or another. Although, having her kiss him wasn't exactly what he expected. But he can't think of a better way to brighten him up. As he watched Yuffie zip her tent back up, one thought went through his mind, 'I'll have to assign her Watch Duty with me from now on.'

And there you have it people! The long awaited update! Not very humorous, but it wasn't really meant to be one. I got some Cloffie-ness in there for all you Cloffie lovers out there. I must say, this chapter certainly turned this fic in a different direction... Well anyways! Review and let me know your thoughts. I was shocked as hell to get 16 reviews on the last chapter alone. I don't think I've ever had so many reviews for a single chapter in any of my stories. Let's see if this one gets just as many, nay?


	5. Cook Or Freeze

Let's check the reviews, (Whistles a small tone as he goes and checks the reviews) Click! (Dies of shock) X.x Whoa... How the... Wow! I never thought I'd have so many wonderful reviews from y'all. Heh heh... Hmm... Maybe I'll do something extra special for y'all! Heeheehee! Hmm hmm hmm... I'm thinking of something rather... interesting. My, my, my, The Great Glaciers can certainly be a fun place to have some good Ol' Fun.

Disclaimer- I don't own Final Fantasy 7

__

Cook Or Freeze

Cloud fought desperately with himself to get motivated enough to get up. But he couldn't seem to get the blanket of fog that has clouded his mind, telling him to stay in his tent. If he had a choice, Cloud would of stayed in his tent, where he's curled up in a ball in his sleeping bag, remaining nice and warm. The thought of getting up and leaving the tent where he'd instantly feel like a human icicle makes him want to cry in protest.

Oh, how he wished the group had made it to the Northern Crater before nightfall, instead of being forced to set up camp on the Great Glacier, where there's a roar of wind that never seems to seize and so much snow that building a camp fire is virtually impossible. Whoever has watch duty gets the pleasure of nearly freezing to death. Cloud can just picture himself turning into a snowman out there, than the next morning the group would have to thaw out their frosty leader before proceeding.

Cloud won't voice his complaints out loud however, oh no sir, he'll keep them to himself like he always does. He'll continue to curse fate for making the Promised Land in such a body numbing place. Oh how Cloud would wish the sun would just beat him to getting up. Than again, at the rate he's going, it may. He was suppose to take watch twenty minutes ago. But he hasn't been able to bring himself to leave the, no-so-comfortable but WARM sleeping bag.

But now leaving the warmth of the sleeping bag isn't the only reason why he doesn't want to get up. The other reason is that he doesn't want to have to listen to the complaints from a certain female ninja for taking twenty minutes to get up. Cloud's surprised that she hasn't ripped open his tent and dragged him out by his blonde spikes so she can snuggle into her own sleeping bag and perhaps regain some feeling in her limbs.

Speaking of Yuffie, she's been acting strange since the night before, the night she kissed him while he was asleep. Well, half asleep. At one point he was totally asleep, but when she wiggled her way out of his hold, the sudden lack of extra body heat made him wake up some. He only became fully awake when he realized Yuffie had kissed him. She never mentioned the incident, nor did he, she just acted indifferent towards him.

Than again, he wasn't much help in the situation, he'll be the first to admit that he had been acting like a 'Royal pain in the ass' as Yuffie pointed out to him when kept telling her to get a fire going, after she pointed out the fact that after a dozen attempts the fire obviously isn't going to start. Yet he insisted that she wasn't trying hard enough, and that's when she told him that he's a royal pain in her ass. Can you blame him though? He was cold, it's fricking ONE degree out! Not twenty, or thirty, ONE, a single digit number, the number isn't even plural, it's just singular, une, uno, ONE! And now he wouldn't be surprised if it's in the negatives.

A half a dozen times Cloud debated if he could just wake up Vincent and send him out on watch duty instead. He knew the Ex-TURK wouldn't mind; he blindly follows any order given to him and would do anything that would help anyone in the group. It's his way for repenting, for what you ask? Cloud isn't sure he even understands what the mysterious man is exactly repenting about. God only knows there's a large list of sins that he feels he needs to atone for.

After giving a short cry of protest, Cloud tore himself out of his sleeping bag and picked up his sword. He didn't even bother changing since he kept his clothes on, knowing it would keep him warmer. The only problem with that however is that he wasn't able to get much sleep, he's too accustomed to sleeping... well no use crying over it. Not like he'd get much sleep when he knows that Sephiroth is near.

Even before Cloud unzipped his tent, he was already freezing, making him look longingly back to his sleeping bag. Oh how he misses it after a whole thirty seconds. Maybe if he's lucky he'll freeze to death the moment he steps out, instead of having to fight with the chilling cold for the remainder of the early morning. After deciding that he can't possibly get any colder than he is now, since he's already shivering violently; not to mention the small little icicles that are forming on his eye lashes, Cloud unzips the tent and steps out.

'Yup... it's definitely below zero.' Cloud thinks to himself. He goes to sheath his sword that he still has in his hands, only finding out that he's having trouble getting his hand off of it. 'Great... my hand is frozen to it.' His brows furrow as he literally pries his fingers off the hilt of the sword with his free hand. Cloud rubs his bare arms, needless to say, he feels like a complete dumb-ass. He knew he should of bought some sort of jacket at Icicle Inn, instead of depending on his sleeveless mercenary shirt. Well, at least his pants have pockets that he can put his hands in. His face and bare arms are the only thing freezing really, the other parts of him are just cold, not warm, cold. Cloud could already tell this is going to be a fun night.

Glancing around, Cloud notices that there's no one around. 'Yuffie must of skipped her shift once she got too cold.' He thinks to himself. He makes a mental note to assign Yuffie double time next time. After all, what would of happened if they were attacked by some monster? Everyone could be killed. Scratch that, everyone would be killed because no one would be willing enough to get out of the warmth of their sleeping bags to fight some creature. Cloud knows he wouldn't. But here he is, standing in the freezing bone chilling cold, feeling more or less like an idiot, playing the good leader that everyone knows and loves him for.

Cloud snorts at the thought. 'If being a good leader includes me freezing to death then they can all kiss my-' Cloud's train of thought stops when he notices footprints in the snow, heading away from the camp. He also sees paw prints heading in the same direction. Cloud immediately recognizes the set of footprints as Yuffie's. Cloud decides the paw prints are most likely from one of the local wolves running around.

Thinking that Yuffie could very well being hunt by a pack of wolves, Cloud quickly follows the tracks, thanking the mighty gods that it wasn't snowing so it wouldn't cover up the tracks. About a fifty yards away from the camp, Cloud stops as his eyes catch sight of a small fire. What seems to strange about the small fire is that it was moving around and appeared to be floating in the air. Cloud thinks of the possibility of it being a torch of sorts. As he gets closer, the mystery of the hovering fire is solved in the form a fiery beast by the name of Red XIII.

"Cloud..." Red XIII nods his head in greeting.

Cloud scratches the back of his head, confused, the freezing temperature momentarily forgotten, "Red? What are you doing here?"

Red XIII's tail swats from side to side as Red XIII sits there on his hunches; staring up at Cloud, "I woke up awhile ago and Yuffie asked me to accompany her."

"Yuffie? Where's Yuffie?" Cloud asks looking around, finding no sign of the mentioned ninja.

"She found a hot spring near by. She's there." Red XIII lifts his paw up to point at the small snow mound, "It's on the other side of that. Unfortunately, I can't convince her to come back to the camp." Cloud gives him a questioning look, clearly not understanding why. Red XIII looks off to the side, glancing up at Cloud out of the corner of his eye, "The temperature of the air is a bit too... cold for you humans to handle, I assume."

Cloud slaps himself in the forehead and shakes his head in disbelief. Cloud watches as Red XIII lets out a beastly yawn, showing off his K9s to the world, "Head back and get some sleep, I'll get Yuffie."

"If you wish." Red XIII replies.

Cloud doesn't know why Red XIII seems so amused by the idea, he doesn't have much time to question it either before the beast is off and running back to camp. Cloud wraps his arms around himself, the coldness making itself known once again. Cloud really wishes he had a jacket. Deciding best to get the ninja before something else around here does, Cloud heads over the snow mound. His eyes fall on Yuffie's form, the back of her head the only visible thing to him as the rest of her body is under the steaming hot springs. Around the hot springs all the snow is melted, leaving only hard rock in it's place.

The sound of Cloud's boots kicking the gravel on the rocky ground informs the ninja that someone is there. Causing her to immediately turn around, her misty gray eyes widening a bit in surprise when she sees who it is, "Cloud!? What are ya doing here!? Where's Red?" She immediately questions.

"I sent him back to camp to get some sleep after he told me where you were. As for what I'm doing here, I'm taking up watch, something that you are suppose to be doing." Cloud says, keeping a few feet away from the hot springs. He has to admit, even a few feet away from the hot springs, it feels much warmer than the rest of the area.

Cloud's eyes catch sight of the bundle of clothing at the edge of the hot springs, he quickly realizes that Yuffie is, in fact, not wearing anything in the hot springs. He's not surprised though, any wet clothing that comes out of the hot springs would immediately turn hard as ice the second they walk away from it. He glances back at Yuffie and raises an eyebrow at her when he notices that her shoulders and her face are quite red, giving her the distinct impression of a lobster. "What are you doing in there anyway?"

Yuffie rolls her eyes at the seemingly stupid question, "Staying warm, duh." Yuffie ducks a bit further under the water in embarrassment, "But uh.. It's too cold to get out, and yet it's too hot to stay in, not to mention I'm skin is beginning to prune."

Cloud quirks an amused smile as he holds in his laughter, "Well, you can't stay in there forever, we are leaving in a few hours."

"I know that!" Yuffie suddenly snaps, waving her hands above her head frantically. She ducks back further under the water till the only thing visible is her head, "But it's too cold to come out."

Cloud shrugged his shoulders, "You got yourself into this mess, you get yourself out." He says before turning around to walk away to give her some privacy.

"Hey! You can't just leave me here! What if something attacks!" Yuffie quickly calls out.

Cloud sighs as she crosses his arms, not even bothering to turn around, "Look, I need to keep watch." He glances over his shoulder to look over at Yuffie, "You can either stay in there and cook, or you can come out and freeze."

"Gee... Both don't sound too bad. Either cook or freeze, whatever should I do?" Yuffie asks, her voice dripping with sarcasm. Cloud shrugs his shoulders before he begins walking away once more, "Alright, alright! I'll come out just give me a moment." Cloud stops and waits. "Uh..." He hears Yuffie say, "Where are my clothes?" Cloud blinks in confusion before turning back around to glance over to where he last saw her clothes, near the edge of the hot springs. Only, they weren't there. Cloud scratches the back of his head, giving a nervous smile when he realizes what had happened to them, "Cloud you spiky headed idiot! You kicked my clothes into the hot springs!" Yuffie practically shrieks.

"Um..."

"Argh!" Yuffie vanishes in the hot springs as she dives under. A moment or two later, she reappears, tossing her clothes on the edge of the hot springs. "Damn it! Well I might as well get changed in here, it doesn't matter now." Yuffie says, putting in the effort to shoot Cloud a nasty glare. Cloud begins walking away again, "Where are you going now!"

"To gather wood to make a fire. The ground here it dry. Besides, you can't return to camp in wet clothes, you catch hypothermia"

"Oh Cloud! I never knew you cared!" Yuffie exclaims, making sure to make it sound extra sarcastic.

Cloud merely shakes his head as he heads over the snow mound in search for a tree. When Cloud gets back with a bundle of wood in his arms, Yuffie is still in the hot spring, but now she has her clothes back on. Cloud piles the wood near the hot springs and gets a fire burning by casting a simple 'Fire' spell. With the sight of the growing fire, Yuffie slowly crawls out of the hot springs and huddles up as close as she dares to the fire to get her clothes to dry.

On the other side of the fire Cloud stared at her drenched form. Noticing how her bangs stick to her forehead, her skin still a bit flushed from being in the hot springs so long, and how her clothes seem to outline ever curve of her body exactly the way it is. Cloud's gaze lowers into the flames of the fire. He has to admit, the young ninja is no longer the 'living twig' she was when they first met her in the forest, she had... 'grown' quite a bit. He already noticed before that she stands just about three inches shorter than himself, unlike when the top of head barely made it to his chin. And the ninja didn't seem to notice it herself, or if she did she just didn't seem to think much of it, but she had 'developed' in some areas that isn't possible to not notice at the moment.

That thought caused Cloud to think about a few moments ago, when Yuffie was sitting in the hot spring without any clothes on. If he was a perverted sleaze like a lot of men, Cloud could of gotten a good look then if he wanted to. The hot springs are pretty clear, so if he wanted to he could have... Shaking his head, Cloud rids the thought out of his mind. 'It's not like I wanted a look.' He tells himself, whether he believed himself or not is unknown to even him.

Glancing back up, he notices Yuffie staring at him, causing him to raise an eyebrow at her. "Did you know that you space out a lot?" Yuffie asks suddenly.

Cloud crosses his arms and lowers his head until his chin rests on his chin. 'Where had that come room?' He wonders to himself. Really, it just seemed so random. And he doesn't space out a lot. He just has a lot to think about. Sephiroth is near, that alone would give him a lot to think about. After all, the safety of the planet is resting entirely on their shoulders. Cloud notices that Yuffie is grinning at him while giving him a knowing look, "What?" Cloud asks.

"See? You're doing it again." She points out. "GAWD! I swear, you have got to be the only person on this planet who gets spaced out as much as you do." Cloud would of taken it as an insult, that is if he cared. But the fact of the matter is that he doesn't, it's not like it's true, after all, Yuffie doesn't know everyone on the planet so how can she make that assumption? But Yuffie doesn't seem to even consider that fact as she continues, "I mean, the way you act, your already to turn into a wrinkly old man like gramps. They do nothing but sit around and think about the good Ol' Days, so you got the whole thing down already."

Cloud rolls his eyes at the ninja, "Is there a point in this discussion, or do you just feel the need to point out the fact that I think a lot?"

Yuffie shrugs her shoulders, flashing him her famous Yuffie Grin, "Well... you obviously weren't making the effort to get a conversation started, with you being all spaced out and everything." Cloud gives a tired sigh as Yuffie continued, "So I figured I'd just let you know that you space out too much."

"You... really can't think of anything better to discuss, can you?" Cloud asks with a raised eyebrow.

Yuffie raises her head up as she taps her chin with a finger in thought, "Mmm... nope! So unless you can think of anything better, I'll just keep pointing out your little annoying habits."

"Oh they annoy you do they?"

"Well duh! It's kind of annoying to try talking to you when you tend to space out in the middle of a conversation." Yuffie explains, giving him an annoyed look.

Cloud scratches the back of his head in thought, "Okay... So what other annoying habits do I have?" Cloud asks, raising a curious eyebrow.

"Well.. for one... You raise your eyebrow a lot when talking, and you scratch you head too much, your bound to give yourself a bold spot eventually."

"I do not."

"You tap your foot too much when your thinking about something."

"I do?"

"You don't talk enough." Yuffie begins counting on her fingers as if it were a list.

"There isn't much to talk about."

"In the rare occasion you actually start a conversation, it's either about Shin-Ra or Sephiroth."

"Again, there isn't much for me to talk about."

"You rarely tell anyone what your thinking."

"Why does anyone need to know what I'm thinking?"

"You hardly ever give a full smile."

"There isn't much for me to smile about right now."

"GAWD! You use that phrase, 'Let's Mosey!' Which annoys the hell out of everyone!"

".........."

"You do that damn stance all the time!"

"The SOLDIER stance?"

"It's irritates the hell out of me!"

"Why?"

"Because it" 'Makes me want to jump you' "... has no point whatsoever."

"It's more of habit than anything else." Cloud shrugs.

"You couldn't care less about anyone else's problems."

"That's not true!" Cloud protests.

"Fine! You couldn't care less about mine!"

Cloud opens his mouth to respond but shuts it when he realizes exactly what she's talking about. He had helped Barret with his problems with Dyne, as well as Red XIII when they went to Cosmos Canyon. Yet in Wutai, Yuffie had told him her home was slowly falling apart, turning into nothing more than a tourist resort. He remembers telling her that he couldn't care less about what happens to Wutai, that all he wanted was his materia back. He didn't think Yuffie was actually effected by his words.

Cloud leans back on his hands and releases a tired breath. He should of just asked Vincent take watch duty. After all, he really isn't up to this tonight. He's too tired and it's too cold out. "OW!" Cloud rubs the spot on his head that Yuffie just hit with a rock.

"Stop ignoring me!" Yuffie demands, clearly becoming ignored.

Cloud thought for a moment about teaching her a thing or two about hurling a rock at him but decided against it. What would he do anyway? Throw it back at her? That would be a bit childish, but than again, who said he couldn't be just as childish as her? "I wasn't ignoring you."

"Yes you were!"

"No I wasn't"

"YES you were."

"Nope."

"Yes!"

"......."

"Ha! You didn't deny it, I win!"

Cloud can't resist the urge to roll his eyes at Yuffie. She seems more or less, like herself now, "Or it's just that I don't care what you think when I know that I wasn't."

"Grr.... You're such a jackass!"

"You're annoying."

"Cold hearted bastard!"

"Brat."

"...Chocobo head!" Yuffie doesn't know what's more irritating, the fact that she's running out of insults or the fact that Cloud hasn't raised his voice at her even the slightest, always keeping his voice cool and collected as always. 'And I know he knows it annoys me!'

"Twiggy." Cloud's lips uplifted the slightest in amusement.

"Twiggy?" Yuffie blinks in confusion, that's a new one on her. "Well at least I'm not fat." Yuffie replies.

"Neither am I."

"I wasn't talking about you either. I was referring to Mr. Giggles." Barret's nickname still brings a grin to her face. She's proud of herself for making it. She called him it one day as a sarcastic remark, and it more or less pissed the man off. Barret is not one who giggles, or laughs much for that matter. Yuffie makes sure to call him it any chance she can get. "Nope, you're not fat." Yuffie agrees ready to continue her chain of insults, "You're a short egotistical mako man, who wouldn't be of use to anyone if you couldn't fight."

Cloud just shrugs his shoulders, clearly not bothered by the insult, "And you're a child."

Yuffie can feel her right eye twitching as she glares at the blonde. If there was one thing she can't stand, it's being referred to as a child. So what if she's the youngest in the group. So what if she technically isn't allowed to drive, or smoke, or drink like everyone else in the group. What's so great about killing your lungs like Cid does. What's so great about getting drunk like everyone else does, only to end up making an ass of yourself. Yuffie has even seen Vincent and Tifa get a bit tipsy before, two companions that she would never thought would even touch a drink.

Everyone in the group regards her as a child. Cloud was the only one who treated her more as an equal than anyone else. He's never before called her a child, brat, but not a child. It only seems to make her even more furious when it's Cloud calling her a child than anyone else. So much in fact that she can't help herself from getting up, marching the distance between them and effectively grabbing the front of his shirt to shake him while shouting, "I am not a damn child!"

What Yuffie wasn't expecting, was Cloud to fight back, even though she's practically straggling him. Cloud however, doesn't fight back by shoving her away, or hitting her likely, he found a different way, and in Yuffie's opinion, 'Quite effective way to beat her.'

While Yuffie continued to shake Cloud violently, and ranting off about how she isn't a child. Cloud surprised her by suddenly reaching out to grab hold of her shoulders before pulling her down until his lips are pressed firmly onto her own. At the sudden pull of her shoulders, Yuffie had given a surprised squeak, but when she realized Cloud was kissing her, she froze in her spot. For a moment Yuffie had thought she had fallen asleep in the hot springs and everything is just a dream.

Than Yuffie finally realizes that it isn't a dream, and that Cloud is, in fact, kissing her. When Yuffie is about to return the gesture however, Cloud pulls away, leaving Yuffie hunched over in her position; her mouth slightly opened in surprised while her eyes seem to hold a dreamy look in them. And believe it or not, Yuffie is quiet.

Cloud begins chuckling, quietly at first, he had never seen Yuffie this quiet before. Even when Aerith was killed, Yuffie wasn't quiet, she was more pissed than anything at first until the fight was over. If Cloud knew that he could get the ninja quiet with just a simple kiss he may have done it sooner.

Yuffie finally snaps out of her gaze at the sound of Cloud's chuckling. Hesitantly she touches her lips likely with two fingers, the sensation of Cloud's lips on hers still slightly lingering there. Yuffie feels her face heat up, and she knew in an instant that she's blushing. She finally realizes that Cloud is in fact laughing a bit, "What are you laughing at!?" She demands, a bit too embarrassed to care how harsh she may or may not sound.

Cloud gets a hold of himself to glance up at her, flashing her an amused smile as he pokes her in the cheek slightly, his finger leaving a white print before her blush heats up that small spot again, "You're blushing." He announces thoroughly amused with the prospect.

"Argh!" Yuffie smacks him alongside the head, "You're such a jerk!" She shouts before marching off, thankful that her clothes are dried so she wouldn't end up freezing to death before she made it to the camp. Although, right now, Yuffie didn't seem to mind the idea as she heads in the direction of the tents, still able to hear Cloud's laughter from behind her.

Heh heh... Yeah... Well... I must say, I think I've lost my pure humorous way thingie. It's not as funny as it used to be but I guess this is working. Actually the next chapter should have plenty of laughs Unfortunately however, I believe the next chapter might be the last. So It'll be something really special for everyone out there.

Here's a question for y'all- What would it be like if AVALANCHE and the TURKS camped together for one night? The next chapter should answer this mysterious question. It won't be pretty o.O

Review!!!!


	6. Effects Of Alcohol

Howdy everyone, yes, I know it's been a long time since I updated this. I was planning on updating this months back but never got motivated enough to put in the effort. So now I have a plan, when it's lunch period at school, I run off to the library and work on it there. So here we are, the next exciting, and long awaited chapter of 'Watch Duty Sucks!'

_Effects of Alcohol_

Rufus Shinra is dead, Meteor is on its way to obliterate the planet, and Sephiroth is still out there in his own little world plotting to become one with the planet. How do you prepare against something that holds the fate of the world in the balance? How do you gather the courage to stand up against all odds, and fight that one last battle? For the group Avalanche, there's only one possible way of pressing forward and come out victorious in the end. There's only one way that they can truly come together as one and stand up against a powerful entity.

"God damnit! What the hell is taking so long brat?" The expert pilot of Rocket Town, Cid Highwind, barked as he waited patiently for the fire to start.

Yuffie, expert thief extraordinaire, was at the receiving end up his building fury, holding two small dried sticks in her hands, which she had been rubbing together for the past twenty minutes. "It's just warming up alright? Give it a minute, gees." Her annoyance was clear to pick up on in her voice.

"Face it brat, yo can't do it." Barret too was growing impatient, standing next to Cid as he watched Yuffie like a hawk.

"I said I could make a damn fire with two sticks, and that's what I'll do." Yuffie had made a bet of two thousand Gil with them that she could start a fire with just two sticks. The argument had lasted a good hour or so, before the three decided that Yuffie will prove it when they reached camp.

Yuffie of course, agreed to it, not ever being one to back down. So the three are currently huddled near the fire pit; waiting for Yuffie's fire to start up. Cid and Barret are there to make sure she doesn't cheat by casting a Fire spell on the sticks.

"Cid, Barret…" The two men turned around at the sound of their blonde leaders voice.

Yuffie paused in her work as she glanced up to stare at their leader briefly, now would be the opportune time to cast of Fire spell, if only magic didn't have to be called out. Her gaze settled on Red XIII's form laying on the ground a little in front of the fire pit, her eyes fixing on his tail. She smiled deviously as she leaned over the fire pit and held out a stick, holding it above the tip of Red XIII's tail. The small flame on Red XIII's tail was enough to light Yuffie's little dried up stick. She pulled it back, made it look like she had still been rubbing them together.

"AH HA! Take that you old geezers!" She announced victoriously, holding up the fire.

Barret and Cid both turned around at the same time to see the ninja with her fire. "Damnit, you cheated."

Cloud shook his head, "Anyway, they arrived."

"Oh goody…" Yuffie muttered under her breath.

One hour later

Yuffie's P.O.V.

I knew for the longest time that Spikes isn't one of the brightest guys out there. I mean, it's pretty obvious. He's made lots of stupid mistakes, or suggested ideas that were just asinine, but this beats the cake. Here we are, Avalanche, in our happy little group, waiting for the world to be flattened into a pancake by Meteor, unless by some miracle we kick Sephiroth's pretty boy ass. And who other than the Turks are here to join us. You have baldy, otherwise known as Rude, as the silent one. Elena, being the pretty little girl, than you have the jackass. He likes to go by the name of Reno, I have no idea why, I think jackass suites him so much better.

"Why are we doing this again?" I whined, I know that I can get on the nerves of my followers, but I just don't like this idea. Am I a brat? Yes. But I can still kick ass like the rest of them, except I'm better. I'm not the greatest ninja ever to walk on the face of the planet for nothing. Nyuk! Nyuk!

Spikes as usual, gave out this little agitated sigh that, which will never be voiced out, I found completely adorable. There are a few things Cloudy can do that are adorable, the sigh, the confused scratch on the head, and then… Well I think that's about it. The rest are in separate categories.

"Shinra is gone, we've gathered up as a truce among the groups Yuffie." He's given me this answer probably five times in the past hour. When Reno and his little group arrived, the first thing he did was pull out a beer from the cooler he brought. Evidently, 'Bring something to the table' meant beer to him. And of course anything Reno does, Rude follows a step behind.

"What's the matter babe? Afraid of my _rod?_" Reno decided to question. Being that I'm seventeen, having had my birthday two months ago, I'm not as completely naive as I was when I was sixteen. Than again, having to hang around Cid, it's kind of hard to remain an innocent little girl. Oh my GAWD! I sound waaaaay too… um smart right now! It's making my head hurt. Okay, screw detailing of this. This is how it is, that was the clean version, this is the unedited version.

Reno is a Grade-A perverted jackass, who happens to be drunk out of his mind right now. He had several marks on his face from already trying to put the moves on his fellow Turk, and I don't mean Elena…. Then he tried putting the moves on Tifa, and well, that was just weird. I don't think Boobs was totally against the idea of sleeping with the never ending erection. GROSSNESS.

Reno is hot, I'll give him that. In a sleazy, dirty, perverted kind of way. He's nice to look at, but when his mouth opens up, it kills his potential good dream image. When he's drunk, he's amusing as hell however. He seems to crave for affection when he's drunk, hanging off of anyone near him. Barret had removed himself before the Turk could crawl into his laugh.

Reno isn't the only one drunk. Hee hee. I kind of… tricked good Ol' Cloudy into getting drunk. I wasn't serious about it, but he just takes any challenge. And seeing how Reno was already slightly drunk at the time, I figured Cloud would win in a drinking contest with him. Boy was I wrong. With four beers down, Cloudy was done, he refused to get any drunker. I was hoping he'd be a prancing ballerina as a drunk, I had a camera set and ready for pictures, for future blackmail of course.

Instead, he hardly acts any different. He acts more like Vincent I guess. Going all quiet and such, looking ever so _mysterious._ Speaking only when needed. Hmm… Spikes should take Vincent's role.

Speaking of Vincent, unlike most men who drink to get drunk, he's still on his first beer, I could tell he's only drank a little of it, sipping at it every now and then. I still say Vinnie is a vampire. And I hear vampires can't intake much of any substance besides blood, because it takes like.. a really long time to digest. Hmm… Looking between Spikes and Vinnie, I mentally switched them, gave them the other's clothes.

I had to laugh at mental image Vinnie in a purple mercenary uniform. I could picture the left sleeve being torn to shreds by his claw while trying to get the damn shirt on. I bet he'd squirm without having the safety of his cloak hiding most of his face.

I set Cloud into Vincent's outfit, and imagined him giving that serious I-going-to-kill-you look on his face. Oh GAWD, I could nearly faint. Hot! Hot! Hot! I think I'd die happily if I could get Cloud to do that. Mmmm… Cloudy.

Did I mention that I've been drinking as well? Tee hee. I managed to convince the others to let me drink. And we got Red XIII a bowl to let him drink as well. Have you ever seen a drunken wolf? Red XIII was definitely out there, his eyes were glazed over in that drunken manner, his head wobbled from side to side as he stood on his feet, just barely keeping himself on balance.

I turned my gaze over to Reno as he moved his seat next to me, I could smell the strong scent of liquor coming off of him, which I could have done without. I felt the weight of his arm as he put it around my shoulders. Being a bit zoned out in my own little world of material, I wasn't really listening to what he was saying, except I knew he was laughing, along with Cid and Barret. "Huh?"

"See? I told you." The Turk commented before laughing, Cid and Barret followed suite. The rest of them just seemed to not care. Reno turned his gaze to me once more, "Highwind and Wallace were wondering if you were even a girl. I told them no."

What the hell?

"You have no feminine bone in your body, you're complete brainless, and you couldn't strike a pose if your life depended on it. Therefore, female you're not."

Oh ho! He dares to insult the Great Ninja Yuffie? Maybe I should shove my shuriken straight up his… actually… He may enjoy that, "I can to strike a pose!" I just never tried before, and had no reason to, and had no idea on how to go about initiating a pose… But that's not the point.

Of course this only seemed to set Reno, Cid, and Barret off once again, even Cloud was giggling over on his log… Asshole. "Sure babe. I'd like to see you try that. Maybe you should take a few lessons from Lockheart first before trying."

Yes, take lessons from Tifa! That's what I'll do! Then I can dress in mini skirts, flash every person with each kick I do, and have boobs! And then I'll have the reputation as a slut which could or could not be true, and chase after a childhood friend, who was in actuality, some little dork that I did not give the time of day. What a great idea! Sarcastic? Me? Of course not…. Maybe a little… but learning how to fight with my fists does sound tempting. "Hmph! I don't need lessons! I can strike a pose!" Er…Okay… Now… What to do…

Normal P.O.V.

Yuffie pushed Reno's arm off of her shoulders and stood up. After taking a few steps away from him she turned to the group and just stood there for several moments. 'Okay… Now… If I were some fancy pants model, what would I do? Uh… Hmm… Oh wait! I know! Nyuk! Nyuk! Nyuk!'

The ninja brushed her fingers through her hair, smoothing it out a little and letting a few strands fall across her face. After leaning taking a small step back on her right foot she placed on hand on her hip; while the other rested across her thigh. She stood tall, stretching her back out, and puffing out her chest. Her lips twisted into a small smirk; between her teeth she held the tip of her tongue. She stood there like that and the camp became suddenly quiet.

When Yuffie was finished with the show, she glanced around to see the damage she's probably caused her; however, she was surprised as hell to see that Barret, Cid, and Reno were not laughing, in fact they seemed to be ogling her. Cid even had his mouth held open slightly, enough that his cigarette fell out and into his lap. Yuffie bit her bottom lip to contain her laughter before glancing over to Cloud. He was just starring at her, his brows raised in interest. Yuffie knew immediately that he knew what she had just done. She felt her cheeks heat up as she tilted her head down a bit to hide the growing blush.

"Alright, Yuffie!" Tifa called out jumping to her feet.

"Ha ha ha! That'll teach Reno to never question a woman." Elena joined in the happy little victory. Both women went to the embarrassed ninja to give her a pat on the back.

"Oh yeah…" Yuffie replied a bit lost.

"Tch.. Whatever." Reno turned and began sipping his beer once more, and the camping went back to normal.

Two hours later, while everyone seemed passed out. Yuffie took it upon herself to rob the Turks of their materia, finding it the opportune moment, which is when they were passed out drunk. She made sure not to drink too heavily for this exact reason. She thought she'd get something good, but was disappointed to find that their material… well… sucked to say the least.

While carrying the materia back to her tent in the far end of camp, she was grumbling about how big a waste of time it was to get their materia, 'Not even mastered. Piece of crap Cure, fire, and lightening materia. You'd think assassins would hold something worthwhile. Pssh.' Of course, it was easy to rob them because no one was in their tents, they were basically all passed out around the campfire. If Yuffie were a fiend, she'd attack them now.

Within the safety of her tent, she stuffed the materia inside of her black sleeping bag. "Making a new collection huh?"

Yuffie heard from behind her. She literally jumped at the voice, and spun around to see Cloud standing in front of her tent's exit. His arms were crossed and one brow was raised in question. "Geez Spikes. Make some noise while your coming would ya? GAWD! You scared the crap out of me."

He rolled his eyes at her, "What are you doing Yuffie?"

"Getting revenge." She said sweetly, as if it were an innocent act. "No body insults the Great Ninja Yuffie and gets off without paying up."

"I think you shut him up when you did the SOLDIER stance." His lips curled in amusement, "Although I didn't think it could look like that."

"Heh heh…." Yuffie gave a nervous laugh as she scratched the back of her head. She could feel her cheeks heating up again, 'Gawd damnit… Stupid friggen body. Work correctly damnit!' She ranted at herself, "Um… like what?"

Cloud tilted his head to the side slightly, giving an innocent look, "Do I look as hot when I do it?"

Yuffie burst out laughing, "Yeah right Spikes! No one can match me! I'm totally on a different level than you." 'As in, you're waaaaaaaay higher up there. Tee hee.' At that moment, the meaning of his question clicked in her head, "Wait… did you just say I looked hot?"

That annoying little smirk that Yuffie hates so much appeared on his face once again, 'Damnit! Stop it Cloudy! Not fair! Ahhh… Calm down Kisaragi… And whatever you do, don't jump him… Ack! Stupid effing teenage hormones. Die! Die! DIE!'

"What's wrong Yuffie?" Cloud asked, in a not at all worried manner.

Yuffie could tell he was getting kicks messing with her like this. 'Hmph! Two can play at this came. That stupid spikey-headed jerk.' The ninja cackled inwardly, as she stepped forward. She grabbed one of his arms and hugged onto it, hanging off of him like the late flowergirl used to do, "Why nothing Cloudy _dearest_. I was just a little surprised that you wanted me that much. I mean, I had my suspicions and all, but wow."

Cloud raised an eyebrow at her, the smirk never leaving his lips, "Well _Yuff-Yuff_…" Yuffie felt her brow twitch at the nickname, oh how she despised it. "…how could I resist? You ARE the Greatest _Hottest_ Ninja Ever."

"Meh… I was born that way, it's my destiny to forever uphold that title." She bit her bottom lip to hold back the smile that was threatening to cross her lips as she raised a hand to his chest where she began tracing small circles. She could still smell the scent of alcohol lingering off of him, 'Hmm… I wonder how long a person stays drunk when they're… drunk. Is Cloud still drunk? He isn't acting like it, than again he isn't acting his normal jackass self either. Maybe he smoked something.'

Yuffie swallowed uneasily as she felt Cloud's arms encircle her small waist before she felt herself pulled to his chest. "Is that a fact?"

She heard him ask, though right now she wasn't really paying attention to what he was saying. She was more focused on the sight of his lips moving. 'Grrrrrrr! Stupid body, stop freezing up! Fine! I give up! If he's drunk he won't remember it, and if he's not, I'll claim that I was drunk in the morning. Yeah! That's what I'll do!'

Yuffie let out a soft breath before she moved her arms up and rested them up on his shoulders leisurely. Her fingers brushed the through the blonde spikes as she slowly rose up on her toes, "…Yep." She barely whispered before pressing her lips against Cloud's. She felt her form get held even tighter against his body, obviously wanting her to stay where she was.

Inside, Yuffie had one thought running through her head. 'Muwahaha! I so kick ass! No one can best me… Mmm… Cloudy…. Heeheehee!'

"What the hell are you doing?" Barret's voice rang throughout the camp.

"I'm looking for my damn material!" Reno's voice cut in.

"Well it ain't going to be there you fool!"

"Could you two be quiet?" Vincent's voice was heard, obviously sounding annoyed, "I have a headache."

"Shut the hell up Valentine! Give me my god damn materia." Reno barked.

"I don't have it."

"Shut up and give it to me."

"I said I don't have your materia."

"YOU'RE LYING!" Reno's yell was drowned out by a howl.

"CHAOS!"

In the tent…

Well…

Cloud and Yuffie were laughing their asses off.

Ahh… Okay this chapter is done… was a bit of a flop. But I've been writing it all week during school, missing my lunch to do this. So cut me some slack. Hope you enjoyed it anyway everyone.


	7. Message

Greetings everyone, let me first thank you for reading this stories. For something that was once suppose to only be one chapter long, it has come so far, and a lot of you have giving me such great feedback. However, Chapter six, if you can remember, was said to be the last chapter. It was mentioned in Chapter Five.

Before anyone has become saddened, I have come to a decision. I can continue this if you'd like, or it can be finished if you think that it has reached its limit.

This is what I want you to do.

These are the choices, I would like you to pick one of them, and if you can, explain why you chose it.

A) No, the fic is good as it stands.

B) Yes, I'd like you to continue, however I'd like it to be a sequel to see what happens after the game.

C) Yes I'd like you to continue this, same set up, however, I'd like you to make it take place in the Advent Children Timeline.

D) Yes- (Other) Share an idea for the fic that you'd like to see what happens.

You may think that option B and option C are the same since they both occur after the game. However, the difference is this. With option B the movie Advent Children will not take part of the story, meaning I won't mention it, or use periods of it. It's basically an AU of after the game, rather than Advent Children.

This is what I want you all to simply do. Vote. It's that simple. The first choice to get ten votes, I will do. There is a little something you should know. If option B wins, and there are some of you who have chosen option D, and your suggestion intrigues me enough, I may end up using the idea.

With that final note, thank you to everyone who has reviewed the last chapter: Swamp-Eyes, Your Inner Eyeball, MystiKoorime, Maiakins, Yulana, Kawaii Eyez, F.L.O.W. Lady Sonora the Black-Rose, silverleafDRAGON, darkmistressofhate, Lady Evelynn, generic soda, secretsquirrell, good job, Neko-Yuff16, purkin, Vaughn Stull, KDeo


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